We head into Thanksgiving week with much to be thankful for.
There will be a next year.
Another chance for glory.
Just look at the Lions and how far they’ve come.
First back-to-back ten win season in their 95-year history.
The epitome of a hapless franchise.
And this absolute bottom-barrel team has monopolized Thanksgiving screen time every year for decades on decades.
And finally, they are not only a somebody, but the favorite to win the Super Bowl.
So just remember that fellow Bears fans while the Lions disassemble us in the early slot.
Except how shitty we are now.
Here are your sad stats for NFL Week 12.
But this was a tough look for a Cairo.
The book is absolutely out on this guy kicking the lowest field goal possible.
Even his made kicks are going only half-way up the uprights.
So who’s the other guy?
Week 16, 2000 for the Bills.
Only his happened in one game which sort of gives him an out.
One could say he just went against a ferocious defensive line.
Cairo sadly can’t even make that sad argument.
Two different teams had his number.
Give those legs a little more room to swing.
Can you figure it out and report it to the CEO?
Oh yeah, the CEO is David Tepper.
What team is missing???
Even in their glory days of the 50’s they never pulled this off.
At least you’ve only been a franchise since 1995.
Had you started it off right you’d have filled that little gap there in 1996.
I’d still love to see a team try 13-men on the field.
I refuse to look up the actual rule verbiage, because I know it will refute my take.
But I’d love to think it’s specific to “12-men on the field”.
Give 13 a whirl, Kyle.
Only one of which ended up scoring.
That’s a 1.29% chance of happening alone.
But then came the extra point miss.
Or, if you’re a social media intern at the Athletic, the field goal.
Looking back at the last couple years, roughly four percent of extra points were missed.
For parlay betters - I believe that’d be like placing a bet at +192,200.
How could that possibly lose?
Minnesota/Baltimore in Week 14, 2013.
Sunday was just the day of the sasquatch plays caught in the wild.
We also had at least two blocked field goals, and a blocked punt.
I almost thought we were in for the impossible 6-1 play for a minute.
But no onside recovery.
And no 6-1 play.
One day we’ll get the sasquatch of all sasquatches.
