It can’t be.
Not after the most preseason-y regular season game in modern Patriots history.
–Truly, it was the most Augustish of all December games.
Starting quarterbacks starting for no reason, then inexplicably getting pulled after a couple of unnecessary snaps.
Guys you’ve never heard of.
–The game itself will be forgotten, if it hasn’t already.
No, not that one.
And every time they went to a new place the name of the city was up on the screen?
Gal Gadot wore that dress?
Dwayne Johnson and Ryan Reynolds were in prison, and he was never more Ryan Reynolds?
“Red” something?
The “Fire Mayo” chants.
–Which begs the obvious question, “So why was Mayo coaching this game?”
For that, I don’t have an answer.
From what I understand, the coaching staff knew this was coming.
Any other thing but what they did do.
Rip the Band Aid off last Monday and elevate one of the coordinators.
Name Rod Rust the interim, not letting the fact he died in 2018 stand in the way.
I would’ve hired Bobby Valentine.
Appointed the bestMaddenplayer from the local Boys and Girls Club.
Whoever won the Patriots.com Fantasy league.
(Come to think of it, ol' Dot would’ve been an upgrade.)
Just do not leave a guy you no longer want in charge, in charge.
When you remove people from power, you have to go all the way with it.
That’s why the French invented the Guillotine.
Let’s jump in now and avoid the rush.
I think it’ll show that Mayo was simply not ready for this assignment.
That he still possesses all the traits people have always seen in him.
Mayo is smart and personable, honest and authentic.
He just was rushed up the coaching ladder too quickly.
Every time you step up to a higher rung, the duties and responsibilities increase exponentially.
He had never even spent a day in the Management Trainee Program that is being a coordinator.
From that step to head coach, the obligations increase exponentially.
And he just could not stop stepping on rakes.
Which wouldn’t matter if his team was winning.
But they just kept getting worse.
–So let this be a lesson to the owners of all businesses everywhere.
For now let’s just say that they picked a hell of a time to put it all together.
Mayo himself seemed like a new man.
I’m not sure I saw him utter a word into his headset all season.
I had serious doubts it was even plugged into anything.
That’s when he chose to get animated.
Engaging with the coaches in the booth.
Working the officials on the sideline.
Asking for the Surface tablet.
Talking to his players coming off the field.
But once June hit and could see the end of the year coming, I was the Punctuality Kid.
Getting my grades just above failing to the point they had to send me onto the next grade.
If Mayo had coached this way in October, he’d probably be back next year.
So I guess we should be grateful he waited until January.
–Alex Van Pelt will probably fare better.
Yes, he’s out a job as well.
But he’s a football lifer.
Yes, there were issues with his playcalling at times.
But I think history will be kind to AVP’s Patriots career.
But nobody execute them.
Let’s get to the good stuff.
And Joe Milton put on a frigging show.
The ball leaves Milton’s hand at 0:16.
You do the math.
(Or don’t; I’m not the boss of you.)
Now add a chaser of Douglas' insane body control and soft hands to finish off this cocktail.
It goes down smooth.
–Aside from Milton’s freakish athleticism, the thing I’m most impressed with is his mechanics.
Which we were told were super rough at Tennessee and needed a lot of coaching up.
And you could see it in camp and preseason.
Well based on yesterday’s look, he’s put in the work.
As have Van Pelt and QB coach TC McCartney.
With his eyes upfield.
His feet more or less under him.
There was no hint of panic or any indication the game is too fast for him.
If nothing else, this is a positive from a game that I wish Milton had lost.
–Then there was the touchdown.
You’re out!"
Mayo: “Don’t you do it!
I got nowhere else to go!
I got nowhere else to g…
I got nothin' else!”
It’s been a season unlike any other for me.
It’s been rough in a lot of ways, and yesterday was no exception.
The tough part is that those are the two I spent the most time talking Patriots with.
Their thoughts, ideas, and opinions shaped mine more than anyone else ever could.
And they’ve been part of every KJR for the 20-plus years I’ve been posting them.
I had to blog from my sister-in-law’s sewing room on a borrowed laptop.
And without the two guys who would’ve most been flipping out about all this news with me.
To thank you for your support and the kindness you’ve shown.
I say again, strap in.
We’re in for a wild offseason.
