Welcome back to another episode of Dumping Them Out.
This episode is coming to you from the Newark airport.
I’m working from the Chicago office this week.
I forgot that we’re in an era of respecting Presidents again.
That’s on me.
My only goal while I’m there is the break the longest drive record on the golf simulator.
I opted to watch the Four Nations tournament over the NBA All-Stars Skills Competition/Dunk Contest last night.
Everybody blames LeBron, and NBA superstars as a whole for killing the dunk contest by refusing to participate.
And it is their fault.
But the internet is what really killed it.
Once everybody realized NBA players weren’t the best dunkers in the world, it was over.
Now, aside from Mac McClung, it’s just hilariously bad.
But the hockey game was a delight.
Really cool Tkachuk brothers.
Very brave, very American stuff.
It’s too bad Matthew Tkachuk checked himself out in the 3rd period when his team needed him most.
He had no problem soaking up all the glory, being Captain America for fighting at the opening face-off.
But when it came down to crunch time, he wanted not part of it.
Despite a career of devastating injuries?
True American hero Joel Embiid.
He was available for the entire Olympics.
Just kidding, guys.
Just kidding, Matthew.
That would be a pretty sick take though.
If I were Canadian I would be all over that one.
But for serious, after watching last night’s game between the U.S. and Canada.
Watching the United States face-off against a true political enemy that is the country of Canada.
The only thing this tournament is really missing is Russia.
Having Russia in this tournament would really make it pop off.
I think we still don’t like them.
They’re the perfect hockey opponent.
Those are the best countries to compete against.
If they do this tournament next year, they gotta get Russia involved.
Where do I send my money?"
Honestly if they’re just investing in Bitcoin it probably works.
I don’t know why you’d need a stranger on Twitter to do that for you.
Like do I think I’m French or something?
It’s so obnoxious.
I’d never thought about that before.
But now it’s all I can think about.
I think broadcasts are piping in squeaks.
How is the squeaking of shoes louder than the damn announcers?
Are the mics in the floorboards or something?
It just seems like we shouldn’t be hearing the squeaks as much as we do.
