All in all, it’s the best thing I’ve read in my life.

A rally celebrating Harris' ownership group was scheduled for later that day at the since-renamed FedEx Field.

But as 1 a.m. became 2 a.m., Snyder was refusing to hand over the stadium keys.

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“I don’t care!”

Snyder said, according to sources with direct knowledge of what transpired in those hours.

“It would be trespassing if anyone goes there.

It’s still mine!”

The imagery of Lil' Dan Dan stomping his feet throwing a temper tantrum is too perfect.

Tagliabue from the clouds!!!!!!

“He f—ing hates it,” Snyder’s dinner companion told the colleague.

I gotta say, I feel zero shame celebrating Dan Snyder’s misery.

He brought so much pain and agony, darkness and sadness to so many people.

Dan Snyder is a human who deserves every bad thing that happens to him.

Fuck Dan Snyder forever.

I’d say -1500 he files some sort of suit for defamation or some shit.