Who knows how long Tua will be out.
Who knows if he will or won’t play again this year, or ever.
As of now, the Miami Dolphins starting quarterback in Skylar Thompson.
I think we can all agree that Skylar Thompson has not once been the answer to any question ever.
They have too much talent on their roster to simply roll over and die.
There are better options out there.
If Tua isn’t going to play again, they need to get somebody.
The current list of free agent quarterbacks is one of the saddest lists I’ve ever laid eyes on.
Walker, and C.J.
Luckily for the Dolphins, I’vecarefullycrafted a list of other available quarterbacks.
Some of these options are realistic.
Some of them are jokes.
Some of them are already backups elsewhere.
Some of them are Colin Kaepernick.
The booth where they are paying him $375 million over 10-years to perform well below average.
He claims he won’t come out of retirement to help his hometown Miami Dolphins make a playoff run.
But I think that’s only because it’s too early in the season.
Of course Tom Brady doesn’t want to play 15 regular season games.
Still a massive longshot.
I’d still but my future house that it won’t happen.
But I’m just spit balling here.
We’ll put Tom Brady on the backburner for now.
Crazier things have happened in football (maybe).
Ryan Tannehill
This is actually a real, sensible possibility.
Ryan Tannehill is currently a free agent.
He’s played for the Miami Dolphins before.
And most importantly, he’s not Skylar Thompson.
I’m honestly surprised the Dolphins haven’t made this move already.
I refuse to believe they’ll do that.
I personally have a better chance of leading the Dolphins to the playoffs than Skylar Thompson.
John Rich (Me)
I’m not a great quarterback.
I’m not a good quarterback either.
I’m not a quarterback at all.
Teddy Bridgewater
I know he’s retired, and currently coaching a high school football team somewhere in Miami.
But retiring from the NFL means nothing nowadays.
Teddy Two Gloves would be a great spark for the Dolphins.
He’s already living down there.
At minimum he knows how to not lose games.
Remember that one time he inexplicably rattled off 5 straight wins with the Saints?
Who’s to say he can’t do that with the Dolphins.
I can’t tell you based on experience if he’s actually any better than Skylar Thompson.
But I can tell you he would inspire more hope.
We already know what Skyler Thompson is.
If I were a Dolphins fan, I’d rather have some fresh blood in there.
Joe Flacco
As a Colts fan, I hate to put Cool Joe on this list.
But maybe they could get some much needed help in the run game for him.
Jimmy Garoppolo
Nobody would fit better in South Beach than Jimmy G. At least based on looks.
He looks like a Miami guy.
And he has has an affinity for dating porn stars.
There are porn stars in Miami.
He’s also 57-24 in his NFL career.
A shockingly impressive record considering his skill level.
He’s clearly used to playing with talent around him that far exceeds his own.
At minimum, I think Jimmy G can get the Dolphins to 8 wins.
If they catch a couple lucky breaks, maybe they’re a playoff team.
But he served his time.
Robert Griffin III
Robert Griffin III still considers himself a viable free agent quarterback.
It’s hard to imagine he has much left to give.
But again… remember who were comparing him to.
I can’t stress enough how much any living breathing human inspires more hope at QB than Skylar Thompson.
And most importantly, RGIII is currently jobless.
ESPN kicked his ass to the curb just the other week.
Johnny Manziel
He’s probably floating around Miami somewhere.
Grab him off the street.
Sign him for a bag a cocaine and see if he’s got any magic left.
Jameis Winston
I highly, highly doubt the Browns would trade him at this point.
If there’s ever a quarterback who needs a reliable-ish backup behind him it’s Deshaun Watson.
Any time now Deshaun could trip and fall into a rape and the Browns would need Jameis immediately.
Not that he hasn’t had a chance before.
He’s the most fun quarterback in the league.
Jameis Winston to the Dolphins would undeniably make this season a few notches more fun.
I honestly think the Jets will be fine, and that Aaron Rodgers will figure it out.
But imagine Zach Wilson playing in the same division as the Jets?
Imagine Zach Wilson beating Aaron Rodgers at MetLife?
What a delightful weekend of football that would be
Colin Kaepernick
John G Mabanglo.
The GOAT of “mAyBe tHeY sHouLd siGn hIm” jokes.
Maybe Colin Kaepernick can bring America together.
Maybe he can help us come to a compromise.
Donald Trump can be President if Colin Kaepernick gets to start in the NFL again.
Except for the Mindful Jock.
I know you were hoping the Steelers would scoop him up to save the offense this year.
But Kap is needed elsewhere.
