Alright folks, we’ve got two developing stories within one blog here. The second one involves sex? In theory this blog should work well, but I need you to stay focused. Sabrina Carpenter appears to have an ability to curse sports teams. Now the Klemmers of the world will say curses aren’t real and blah, blah, blah. Cubs goat curse, Drake curse, Madden curse, Red Sox destroying the 2018 WS trophy curse....

Tate’s blog bell was taken, so he bought a blog horn. Similar concept, just much louder. Soon after posting this, the thief revealed themselves. Catch the full Yak here:

Yesterday we had Jerry Jones turning into a true leader. He threatened to fire radio hosts for questioning him about the moves he made during the offseason. Now we have his defense: Oh. Can’t question him because he pays you and you’re not football people. Alright, he’s not going to listen to you about football stuff unless you’re a REAL fan. And if you’re not a real fan you better be in football....

All the talk heading into tonight was that the Flyers were about to walk into a buzzsaw. The Edmonton Oilers started off the season 0-3. Connor McDavid hasn’t scored a goal yet this season and is a -5 on the year already. I guess everyone forgot that Matvei Michkov is the one who knocks. This is a kid who is addicted to scoring goals. So in his 3rd game in the NHL, Michkov decided he was done wasting time....

And here….we…GO! It’s going to be a long, plentiful year of new records and milestones from the Great 8. Every game last season it seemed he was passing some sort of legend in some sort of scoring category. Maybe some numbers are arbitrary, but 700/700 is pretty insane. Let’s watch how sick his 2nd assist of the night was…in Spanish! Beautiful in every way. My official prediction is he will break it in October of next season....

TMZ- The former One Direction singer died Wednesday evening. We do not know if it was intentional or accidental. I am absolutely speechless about this. Truly sick to my stomach. I really don’t even know what to say. I don’t even know what to throw in in this blog, truly. No one should die this early in life.

By the way, are we hiring writers? Nick Chubb would be a great fit here! Thats when you know its serious. The dark thoughts start creeping in. It got me to laugh, but then it made me sad. I really don’t hate the Steelers anymore. I grew up hating them. I was taught to hate them. Doing chores, learning lessons, not having money for the easy way out. And Nick Chubb understands that....

Auston Matthews is currently the greatest goal scorer in the NHL. We’re now over a week into the 2024-25 NHL season. Auston Matthews hasn’t registered a single point in 3 games yet. Holy fuckin' sauce. That was a spicy arrabbiata. Then we went 7 years without another goalie goal in the NHL. And for good reason. Goalie goals always get the boys buzzing. Look at how fired up the bench got for Gustavsson after that snipe–and especially Fleury....

Sorry, Deion) or simply “King” or even “Greatest Human Who’s Ever Lived.” Today, I was really afraid we’d see a whole new Robbie. Viral fame can change a person overnight. I thought Robbie may not even show up today. Or if he did, he might have 9 hookers with him or a crippling drug addiction. But I was pleasantly surprised to see that Robbie hadn’t change A BIT. He even sat next to me today and I got to sniff him when he wasn’t looking!...

So quick little context here. I have a 9-month-old daughter at home, so I’ve been watching a ton of Disney+ lately. A lot of Bluey, Mikey Mouse Clubhouse, all the sing-a-long movies like Moana and Encanto. Now credit to Disney, they’ve put out a ton of elite characters throughout the years. Icons and legends galore. I mean this dude was wheeling around chicks left and right. They didn’t call him the Minnesota Miracle Man for no reason....

I know places like New York/New Jersey will argue they have the best food in the world. I know places like Italy or Argentina or anywhere else will scream they have the best. But oh no my friends. It’s right here in southwest Ohio. A place where it’s nothing but class, sophistication and innovation. And all you need is the proof right here. Skyline flavored ice cream is about as creative as you could get....

So many Hollywood actors juice for roles. This one might be even crazier than Kumail Nanjiani. He got insanely jacked. But now check out this transformation. She def added at least 3 inches to her bicep circumference. Apparently she’s not just hitting arms but also legs from a post earlier this summer. I am just wondering if she’s stacking any serious Hollywood steroids or its just creatine. Looks like waterweight from her face but that could just be her hair style....

Recipe courtesy Cole Haldane of 7 Waterboard Recipes Send recipe ideas to NJTank99@gmail.com.