The vast majority of the time, that would be a dereliction of my duty to my employers. The nice multi-hundreds-millionaire who owns this place has the Fuck You money to talk politics. But that water-view roof deck I’m planning on Stately Thornton Manor is going to require financing. Besides, I’ve seen too much to have much faith in any career politician. But today, all that changes. Because we’ve found THE candidate for what’s ailing this country....

Their first shift of the night. A couple of guys who will do literally anything their team needs them to do. This is peak entertainment. This is what sports are all about. It’s insane that this is just a random Tuesday night in the National Hockey League. I mean, sure, Rangers vs Capitals is a big rivalry and those games are always pretty intense. You want some immediate juice injected into a hockey game?...

It was inevitable, given he’s speaking extemporaneously for three-plus hours every week. A “if you put enough monkeys at enough typewriters” scenario. … Spaz was a strange choice by Brady. Two years ago, Beyonce removed the word from her song Heated after receiving criticism from disability activists. Lizzo similarly had to change a lyric in one of her songs after receiving the same criticism. OK, so spaz is no longer acceptable....

Not did she cook for us, live on the show. But she was a spicy gal! She also may have perfected Thanksgiving. We hope to collab with her soon!Catch Tuesday’s full Yak:

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A live, animated Bengals-Cowboys game will take place in the world of “The Simpsons.” MLB should take note. Get them started young. The Simpsons is beloved by all ages, old and young. And for good reason. What was originally scheduled to be a Bengals-Cowboys Monday Night Football snoozefest, is now appointment television. (Even though they are forcing us to stream it on Disney+ or ESPN+). You don’t have to sacrifice one of the regular connection broadcasts (with horrendous announcers)....

And I like very few things more than a roast beef sandwich absolutely SMOTHERED in gravy.

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We all saw what happened last night on Monday Night Football. Yep, let’s check the tape. If that’s not enough, we had Deonte Banks get benched. I know Banks shouldn’t be CB1, but can we at least pretend to give a shit? Instead he’s going low on Harris and getting hurdled. We’re supposed to think it’s a positive that a quarterback in year SIX is showing emotion? What about not fucking up every single 4th quarter?...

Living in Atlanta is turning Kirk Cousins into a different animal. We walk in your trap and take over your trap.

I woke up today, still feeling dead/numb, but probably better than I felt yesterday. Then I saw this. The decisions that are a tad harsh, but are best for the organization. Extend Eberflus so he can hire an OC who also has very questionable judgement and play-calling. I watch the Lions just about every week and it’s just because I love their brand of football. They bite knee caps and all that, but they also just play beautiful football....

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